I have found that those ah ha moments are some of the best teaching moments. Moments when I can look back and reflect on my life and finally understand the answers to questions and why things had to happen the way they did.
There is a story called "You Are Special" which had this kind of impact on me today. It is a story that I loved growing up and haven't heard for many years until today. Hearing it today I caught the meaning of the book in a whole new light. It is a story that parallels the teaching of the gospel that we are all children of God and he knows and loves us each individually. If you don't know the story it is about a young Wemmick named Punchinello who was made by the wood carver Eli. The wemmicks give dots or stars to each other depending on how they see each other. Stars are for the pretty, athletic, charming (etc.) people, while the dots or for those looked down upon. Punchinello was one who had many dots and he felt like he had no worth. Then one day, while walking, he meets a woman without any dots or stars and asked her how she managed that. She told him it was because she took the time to talked to Eli everyday. He asks her why she did that and she then told him to talk to Eli to see for himself. I will quote the rest because I cannot do the beauty of the text justice.
"Punchinello walked up the narrow path and stepped into Eli's shop. His eyes grew big. The stool was as tall as he was. He had to stretch on tiptoe to see the top of the workbench.
Punchinello swallowed hard. "I'm not staying here!" Then he heard his name. "Punchinello?" The voice was deep and strong. "How good to see you. Come - let me have a look at you."
Punchinello looked up. "You know my name?"
"Of course. I made you."
Eli picked him up and set him on the bench. "Looks like you've been given some bad marks," said the maker.
"I didn't mean to, Eli. I really tried hard."
"Punchinello, I don't care what the other Wemmicks think."
"You don't?"
"No. You shouldn't either. What they think doesn't matter. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special."
Punchinello laughed. "Me, special? Why? I'm not very talented and my paint is peeling. Why do I matter to you?"
Eli spoke very slowly. "Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."
Punchinello didn't know what to say.
"Every day I've been hoping you'd come," Eli explained.
"I came because I met Lucia," said Punchinello. "Why don't the stickers stay on her?"
The maker spoke softly. "Because she has decided that what I think is more important than what others think. The stickers only stick if you let them.
"What?"
"The stickers only stick if they matter to you. The more you trust my love, the less you care about their stickers."
"I'm not sure I understand."
Eli smiled. "You will, but it will take time. For now, come to see me every day and let me remind you how much I care."
Eli lifted Punchinello off the bench and set him on the ground.
"Remember," Eli said as Punchinello was leaving, "you are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."
Punchinello didn't stop, but in his heart he thought, I think he really means it.
And when he did, a dot fell to the ground."
("You Are Special" by Max Lucado)
There is a beautiful message in these lines that I had never seen before today. It made me think of my Heavenly Father and how much he loves each of us individually. I can just hear him say "Of course I know you, I made you." Punchinello made a choice to go talk to Eli just like we should make the choice to pray to our Father in Heaven. When we truly turn to him in prayer and scripture study we will find that he sees all of our flaws and mistakes just like Eli saw the dots on Punchinello. However, just like the wood carver, the Lord does not care about the dots and the view of others, all he cares about is that we remember to repent and turn to him for help. He is waiting for us to come to him. He is saying "Every day I've been hoping you'd come." The lord is ready and willing to come to our aid and bless us, but we must seek him first to show him that we know that he will help us and also to show that we are willing to accept his help. We shouldn't care what others think about us, all we should be concerned about is what Heavenly Father thinks of us and how we can make Him the most important thing in our lives. The Lord wants us to be confident in ourselves but also wants us to have humility and charity in our hearts. We need to shed both the stars and the dots to become truly like him. The more we trust in the lord, the less we have to fear.
We are special, just as Punchinello. We may not see it at first but as long as we continue to turn to the Lord and talk to him everyday, we will see ourselves in the way that the Lords see us...as his special child...as someone who has potential and purpose on this earth...as someone who can make a difference to those around them...as someone who has worth..."Because you're mine. That's why you matter to me."
I know I am not perfect and I know I will continue to see difficult times, but also I know that as long as I keep the perspective that I am special, then I know I will find light at that end of the tunnel and will be able to shed myself of all the dots that I have collected over the years...dots not just given by others but dots that I have given to myself...dots of self doubt, pity and self put downs.
I know that I am a daughter of God. I also know that I will see my Heavenly Father again and I hope and pray that when I do that I will be able to stand in his presence with confidence and say 'here I am lord, I have made it, and I know that I am special because you made me. And you don't make mistakes.'
"Remember, you are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."
